Issue #13: Anthrax - Friend or Foe?

 Sooooo, um..... Does anybody have anymore butterscotch candies? I've got a cough. *HACK HACK!!*
 Nope. Sorry.
 I, uh.... I think maybe..... Ummmmm
 What, woman?! Spit it out already!
 .............................. Nevermind. It wasn't important anyhow.
 Please, God, if you exist, PLEASE kill that yellow pizza shaped bitch with a ball of godly lightning or something just as horrible before she utters another comment that might cause my brain to implode!!!
 Hey, who let the little wop in here. I thought this was a 2-bit meeting only.
 It's-a me, Luigi. Would-a you like-a to suck-a my cock, you insane mothafuckas?
 Did that little piece of shit just say what I think he said?! Yar, go kick his spaghetti-sauced ass!
 Oh no! Thats-a not fair! Thata little bug has got-a some mean lasers and-a shit! Don'a make-a me use-a my special weapon on yous!
 BZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ! Ha ha ha!! He's shaking in his human waste-encrusted boots already! BZZZZZZ!
 Yous guys aren't gunna give up, no? Okey doky then. Mario!! Why don't yous-a show-a these mongos what-a yous can-a do.

 Shut the fuck up, Luigi. I know what I'm supposed to do. Sheezus, why mom never scraped you fully out of her uterus after she already poked your brain in with that knitting needle I'll never know.


 Uh... Oh, ummmm. Never mind.


 BZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ! What do we do now, boss?

 I say we sodomize them! That'll teach them a darn good lesson!

 *BEEP* Yes, it taught US a lesson!

 *BLORP* Yes, a valuable lesson!

 *BLIP* My anus pixel still hurts!

 Oh quit your bitchin. You know you liked it. Yesssssssss, you know you did.

 Oooooo! Can I get in on some of that action?

 Wh-what the fuckadoodle?! I know I crispied your big gay ass to ash faster than a Holocaust victim in the oven! How did-

 Megaman confused too. Why does every orifice in Megaman's body feel like train tunnel?

 Yeah, sorry bout that. After I re-animated your remains I left you on the operating table within sight of Link's bed. He recovered like a champ when he saw the possibility of fag sex with a little boy in a robot's body. And the rest is history... and up your ass.
 I confused.

 Shut your piehole, Pee-pee Face! Hey, Doc, are you telling me that you fixed up everybody that I desintegrated? Then how did you re-enliven yourself?!

 Actually, dipshit, if you recall I wasn't there that day. Dick-choker. I was busy getting it on with Zelda. I mean, DAMN, she can suck the chrome off my ding-dong like a vacuum in a windtunnel!!

 ........So my precious Zelda's been deflowered by the likes of him.....

 Does "deflowered" mean getting ass-fucked doggie style in a bathtub filled with human excrement while a live web-cast is sent out to the entire world for $30 a minute?

 Holy crap, you mustached menace! You better have kept a file of that somewhere. Daddy needs some loving tonight.

 BZZZZZZ! Ack! They're all back!! They're all alive again!!! BZZZZZ! This is all your fault, Frygar!! I told you we should have urinated on their remains when we had the chance!!!

 Piss off, you bug-dropping missile commander! If it wasn't for me we wouldn't have even come this far!
 Oh yeah! I just remembered what I was going to say before. *AHEM* "You suck tiny little wrinkled old man penises.... And you like to have sex with Charlie Sheen."

 So THAT'S how it is, huh?!? So you're ALLLLL against me, huh?!? Well just FUCK OFF *COUGH* All of ya's! FUCK OFF!!!!!

 Whoa! Wait a minute, Fry-guy! I think I know what you're thinking. Don't do it. Trust me, you'll regret it tomorrow when there's nobody around to suck you off after your daily prune juice enema and urethra cleanser!

 *COUGH* I've been saving this one for a rainy day, Dickfall Harry, you guys is goin' DOWN!!



What... What have I done?.... No... They were my... My friends... I killed them. Killed them all! NOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!

 *BEEP* You didn't waste us!

 *BOP* Yes, you saved us!!

 *BONK* You didn't have the guts to kill-

 I'm... I'm so alone.

 Whoa, dude! That was pretty high-ness!!

 It's pronounced "Hi-ee-nuss".

 *SOB* Make it stop!! Make the pain stop!!!

 Mario! Yous won over da bad-a guy! Will yous let-a the fucka go so-a that this-a mad circle of death and-a charred remains goes-a on-a forever?

 Fat chance, my septic-tank bathing brother. Monkey! Eat lizard!

 So it comes to thi- AEEEEEIIIIIIIIIIIIII!


 ...... Holy shit! You just never get used to that no matter how many times you see it.

 Damn it, Mario!!! When you recongeneticized me, couldn't you have used my fixed up genes after all my plastic surgeries or something!!


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