Rossman Reviews and Ratings
Rossman Reviews and Ratings
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The "Likes 'Em In Tight Suits"

The idea of building a show around T&A isn't a new one -- it's been done in porno since the 1920s. Building a "giant robot" anime show around T&A is a new idea though, and it may initially sound intruiguing.... but it's not. Not really. It's like I said about Najica: panty shots and jiggling female bodies in front of the camera are meant in only small doses, otherwise they lose their *sproingy!* effect. Which brings me to Godannar -- bouncy, bouncy Godannar. Where all the womens have HUGE titties, round and rock-solid butts, and legs that go all the way up (twice!). So, while it's nice (VERY nice) to look at, I was hoping for a bit more to it... Not that it outright sucked, it's just... Well, let me start from the beginning:

A while ago I was told about the plot of Godannar as such: "Dude, okay, so like this 30 year-old robot pilot guy is going to marry this 18 year-old hottie whom he first met when he saved her in a battle against giant aliens 5 years ago... About the same time that the guy lost his previous girlfriend under mysterious circumstances. But, like, of course the wacky aliens started attacking JUST as the guy and girl are about to say 'I do,' and the guy runs off to pilot his robot against the invaders in the middle of the ceremony! But his zesty fiancee is peeved, and she accidentally finds a robot that she can pilot herself, in order to help her hubby-to-be in the battle. They bicker and nag each other the whole time they fight, and their robots merge into one super machine too! That's just all in the first episode! Soon the guy's old girlfriend comes back and throws a crazy monkey-wrench into the gears of the happy home life that the newlyweds are trying to create. Oh, and the guy's horny little brother moves in with them right after they get married too! Oh man, it's just so kooky and zany!"

So, while a fairly accurate description of the first couple of episodes, I thought for goddamn sure that Godannar was going to be a comedic, satiriffic send-up of Gundam, and every other giant robot show ever made. Instead it's pretty serious. No, it's not Grave of the Fireflies serious -- there is some humor in it -- but the situations mentioned above (the two getting hitched, the girlfriend coming back, and the piloting of the robots that combine into one) are played pretty downbeat and deadpan. The tone really caught me off guard. It's very dramatic... Some might say it's OVERdramatic... Not me personally, but some might.

Anyway, so there's an alien attack on the planet Earth, and giant robots are our only hope to stop them. Been done before... All the women (all the HOT, SEXY women) of the Japanese branch of the giant robot defense force are all ka-razy over the pig-headed, "only knows how to pilot his robot, and not much of anything else (including pleasing women)" lead character, Goh. Sounds familiar... The unique special forces from around the globe are made up of colorful individual teams of two -- each with their own special power or ability -- and all these teams are friends and good buddies. Ever see Kiddy Grade?.. There's a mysterious loner in the mix, and he's got his own supah-robot and his own agenda against the aliens, and whoever else might get in his way. It's usually this kind of guy who's the main protagonist, but once again it's just another case of "been there, did her, got matching tattoos, did her again, took pictures, and posted them on the internet."

There was absolutely nothing original in this show. Old lover coming back from out of nowhere in order to create a wacky love triangle with the new love? Check. Sexy and in charge commanding officer? Well, Anna's mom (Anna being Goh's new bride whose wedding was initially stalled due to the aliens attacking) is technically the science officer or something shit, but she's usually the one calling the shots when things get hairy... But yeah, that's a check. Missing family member who isn't talked about but who has a big part to play in the final battle? Big check. Death of a friend early on in the series in order to make us think that anybody can be killed off and that we should stay on our toes?... Check. Hell, several big characters died and came back to life throughout this series, but that actually kind of ruined any effective or exciting storytelling that the show may have been aiming for. Really, Godannar could have been a really really fun show if it either took some chances by turning its world on its ear and throwing plot elements at us that we've never seen before (or have seen differently), OR by actually going in the direction of Dual! Parallel Trouble Adventure and making it a satire, or at least something with a lot more silliness in it. Seriously, some of the scenarios in this show could have easily been hilarious if you just had a guy in the background making overly-shocked expressions to the goings on in the foreground (i.e. think of that male teacher in Azumanga). I honestly began laughing at some of the situations until I realized "Oh, wait... they're serious.. Whoops!" Maybe that's just me though... I've seen too many Gundams, Evangelions and all their clones to take this stuff seriously anymore. It's the same old trip, recycled into oblivion... What the world needs now is for Hideaki Anno to get off his butt and "reinvent" this new generation of robot shows (with too much angst and too few characters to root for) that HE created in the first place!

One thing that I did really really like about Godannar though was the music. The music and the animation. TWO things, two things that I really really liked. The music was big and bold and very moving at times (usually it was the music that first clued me into the fact that a certain scene was dramatic and not geniusly comedic). The battle music is just what ALL giant robot shows' battle music should be like: heroic and triumphant! The animation throughout is very smooth and well choreographed too. The choreography of battles and fights in series like this usually only stick out when they suck, but here I found myself impressed most of the time (most of the time). And, God help me, I did enjoy the (over)abundance of jiggle that was generously sprinkled throughout the 26 episode run like silicone implants from an exploded booby-making factory. Soooo bouncy... And I liked how the animators made you realize just how cold or very excited the female characters were in the last few episodes, while the final battle wages on! You could just feel the nipples, errr, nervousness through the screen.... You could lick it too. Don't give me that look... It's a perfectly normal reaction.

What did I think of Godannar? It's been done many many times before, and the main character was a choad. But the final final episode and it's 1/2 hour-long epilogue made up for some of that (by answering questions that I thought the writers had abandoned or forgotten, and by letting the characters move on with their lives after all is said and done). I was planning on giving this show a C, but after the final ep. I find that I must give it a C+. So there. Slightly above average.

The "Not a Fan of Piggy Men"

I am sick and tired of Japan drawing shows of nothing but women in tight outfits with large chests, who bounce and sway with a slight breeze!... Or are these just the only shows that my brother makes me watch?... Whatever. I'm just sick of it. And sick of the fact that all these bouncy women are always only in love with ONE man (all of them, and the SAME man) in the show, and that man is always a thick-skulled, only-thinks-of-himself, insufferable jerk. Why? Is this what Japan is like? Is most of the population just pathetic, and the few cool-looking men get all the women despite the fact that they're callous and stupid? Yeah, that's what America is like (except for my Pookie-bear, Kiff), but at least we don't go making every animated show about this... Ugh, my head hurts.

I did not like this show. It's so full of bounce, butt and crotch it's pathetic.

The God-Only-Knows SKIPPER

Is every show from Japan about attractive females piloting robots? Arrrrr... What a strange land that be.



There wouldn't be anybody out there reading this who would have some pictures of the young lasses in their tight uniforms, would there?.... Or out of them?

Arrrrr, I may not know art, but I know what I like... And I do indeed like bosomy girls who jiggle in skimpy outfits. Arrrrrrr.