Page 2

Then Captain Hammer walked through Arnold J. Rimmer on his way to the loo (the Captain was looking for the head, not the hologram). Rimmer was in good spirits though, and he taught the Captain how to do the 12-minute version of the Space Corps salute. Whattaguy!

 

"Take THIS, you bastard! *WAMMO!* All she ever wanted to do was bang a human! Why couldn't you understand?!"

I think the funniest part of this picture is the dude looking at the camera underneath the Captain's punching arm.

 

Goddamn xenomorphs always latching on to my woman!... At least it wasn't a face hugger going for the ultimate Frenchie....

 

Speaking of hugging, Captain Hammer never gives up the opportunity for free hugz! He even considers the face groping to be a bonus.

 

Shit was about to go down... I could feel it like Mt. Vesuvius starting to gurgle and get the squirts.

 

After the xenomorphs ate a space marine, Captain Hammer jumped in and soothed the remaining aliens' egos... Then it was time for the sexy threesome. Their tails are AMAZINGLY prehensile.

 

"So you see, when I accidentally killed that child by throwing that horse on top of him, it was totally in self defense. That child had an ice-cream cone... And I'm totally on a diet. Will you take the case, Mr. Birdman?"

"I'll let you know after I review your briefs. Your real, legal briefs, not your... you know. I'm sure those are 2 weeks old and crusty."

 

"Whoa, whoa, whoa! Black Nick Fury and White-Black Nick Fury?! What the hell is this world coming to?! And where's Black-White Black Widow. Now THAT is a Black-White ass I'd like to see!"

 

Cupcake ran into Rory Williams' bachelor party and simply had to join in the festivities... Until some asshole popped out of the cake and told the groom-to-be that his fiancee just tried to kiss him. Man did THAT sour the mood.

 

So I followed that bachelor party-spoiler around in order to ruin his day, but it turned out that he was really an okay guy, and he liked hanging out with Daenerys Targaryen. They made quite a sexy couple, I must admit.

 

Daenerys met Mini-Daenerys, and a whole lot of cute dwarf tossing commenced! I got her 12 yards!

 

The 11th Doctor got some kind of noodles and Chinese fried foods for lunch that Friday. It made me kind of nervous after he took a bite, scanned the meal, then looked at his sonic screwdriver and said, "Hmmm, and I thought I liked pussies..."

 

The Doctor found Jesus! He was in the food court the whole time.

 

The Doctor said this never happened to him before. He said one is usually enough to get the job done. That's when Daenerys laughed.

 

The Doctor ran into the Master (not that Master, but the one from Manos - Hands of Fate), and had to teach the beautifully mustached man his jazz-hands routine. The Master learned quickly, but then Torgo stumbled into the lesson with some pizza and got hot cheese and sauce all over his robes. That Torgo....

 

The Doctor then bumped into the President of the Colonies, and after a quick scan he found he had to break some bad news to her. She took it like a champ and then started making out with Manuel Noriega. Wait, that was Edward James Olmos? That makes a bit more sense I guess.